So Long, 2010

So, I've managed to forget to upload pictures from Christmas almost everyday this week, and to be honest, it's not gonna happen tonight either!

But can you blame me, tonight we'll bid farewell to 2010. All the happiness, love, laughter, tears, and sadness that the year was full of...you've been quite the emotional roller coaster!

Nonetheless, cheers to all the new friends, new experiences, new lessons, and new memories!

As for 2011...can I just say I hope you'll be a little more peaceful? That would just be so nice! a girl can dream, right?

So, here are my resolutions: don't laugh, m'kay?
  1. Continue to go to the gym regularly and work towards my health/appearance goals.
  2. Stay in better touch with my dear friends (get better at phone calls/video chats/emails/fb messages, etc)
  3. Look into agility training for Dexter (he'd have so much fun with it!)
  4. Spend more time with my hobbies (photography, crafts, sewing, roller skating, etc)
  5. Try a new recipe at least once a week
  6. Go hiking more often
  7. Travel somewhere new

That's all I have for now, maybe I'll update this before the night is through...

If we don't speak until after midnight, I hope this new year will bring you new happiness and peace :) 

Christmas

I can't believe Christmas has already come and gone!

Our week in San Diego went surprisingly smooth...no complications, no drama...it was really nice :)

I didn't get to spend too much time with friends since we're all so busy, but I almost saw everyone at least once! The majority of my week though was spent with family, which was really nice :) I probably spent too much money on people's presents, but it was worth it to see their delighted faces! Chris unfortunately couldn't make it down with Linda, he spent Christmas in San Louis Obispo with Grandma Julia.

Kyle and I did a lot of running around to see family! Christmas Eve we first did early dinner with his Mom, Kaleb, Auntie B & Uncle Bob & their kids. Then we went to my parent's house to spend time with family and friends. Tamales & Games were followed by our traditional trek to midnight Mass :) Christmas morning was spent with my family with lots of coffee, breakfast, and of course, present opening! Then we went to his Mommy's house and we opened presents, then went over to his Grandma's house where we did more presents and dinner. Afterwards, we once again went back to my parent's house, my mom made Persian food for Christmas day dinner :) Lots of food, games, and good times :)

For the majority of the week, it was as if everything was totally normal and fine...which was such a relief! It was an actual vacation!

I really didn't want to leave...but here I am, second day back in Seattle.

New Year's Eve is on Friday, and I have to confess that I am terrified of the upcoming new year. I mean, sure, there are quite a few things I'm looking forward to...but there are some inevitable things that are approaching quickly. My dad's health, for example, is looking worse and worse. Essentially we are at the end of the line here...my Dad's kidney can no longer function on its own, he goes to dialysis every other day for 4-6 hour sessions. He is exhausted all the time, he can't take more than 5-10 steps without having to stop because he's just so drained of energy. It's really hard to see him as he is...it's just terrifying thinking that he won't be with us much longer. My dad is an essential part to our family's foundation, and I don't know how we'll function without him. It's terrifying to think that it's incredibly likely my dad will pass away in this new year. I mean, the doctors don't even have a "game plan" at this point, sure they put him on the donor list, but the wait is about 5 years. But, honestly, even with dialysis every other day, my dad can't make it another 5 years.

Wow, this topic somehow got really heavy, I was trying to post something light, but I guess it'd be ridiculous to ignore everything but the light happy stuff...but anyway.

I just wanted to say how grateful I am for having had a peaceful, merry Christmas with the people that I love. Hope you had a Merry Christmas too, reader!

This past week...

To quickly summarize...

I finished my fall quarter classes
I watched The Black Swan (very good, and kept me on edge)

I made way too many cookies (sugar cookies, thumbprint pb & hershey kiss cookies, and gingerbread men)
I spent too much on people's Christmas presents (happens every year...hah)
I went to the gym a lot (it makes me feel good!)
I saw Carly for a little bit (I gave her some coffee to soothe her addiction, she gave me a bottle of wine)

Tonight, Kyle and I are packing for San Diego, because tomorrow right after I get off work, we'll be heading to the airport and making our way home :)

I'm really looking forward to seeing our families, and of course, our friends :)

Woo hoo!

Disney Quest!

Jenny and I have embarked on a Disney Quest...and by that I mean we decided to watch our favorite Disney movies in chronological order, haha :) so far, we've watched...

 

Me, me, me.

Operation self-improvement is going well so far!

Jenny and I joined LA Fitness yesterday, and can I just say, it feels good to work out. We're going back today, and tomorrow morning we have our 1 free session of working with a personal trainer. I really like it, doing something that makes me feel good. :)

The gym is only 5 minutes away, which is very convenient, and it's really big and clean. It was also neat considering our "cute girl discount" was way better than Jenny's Starbucks discount :) tehehe!

I'm going to start planning/making healthier food. Not to say I eat unhealthy, at all, but it could be healthier, I'm just usually too lazy to go that extra mile. But not anymore, girl power has been our motto recently, and I'm totally digging it!

Today might not have started out so great (my hair looks awful and I got a flat tire on my way to work), but I'm really looking forward to going to the gym tonight :)

If I wasn't so embarrassed of my flabby body, I'd post before & after pictures...but I'll just (hopefully) post pictures once I reach my goal :)

Girl Day!

One of the things I love about living with Jenny is that she has incredible mind-reading powers (or maybe blog reading powers? haha). Yesterday we decided to indulge in ourselves :)

It all started with a fun Mani-Pedi at this little hole in the wall place...it wasn't too expensive, and our nails look fabulous! The pedi chairs were massage chairs (omg, what a luxury, lol) and as if that wasn't enough, we got shoulder rubs while receiving the manicures :) Honestly, my nails haven't looked this nice in SO long (I went classic french because I figured it'd be easier than trying to make sure my outfits complemented my nail color, lol). Also, I haven't painted my toe nails in years...I forgot how much I like painted toe nails. They take normal looking feet, and make them cute :)

After a relaxing and fun time getting our nails done, we went to Starbucks and got Peppermint Mochas and then went to see Tangled. Seriously, Tangled is the best/cutest/funniest/saddest animated film I've seen since Up (yes, Up is still my all-time favorite, but this is a pretty close second!). If you haven't already, go see it! Now! :)

After the movie, we went home to make dinner, eat pumpkin cheesecake, and caught up on Gossip Girl. OMG, last night's episode was insane!!! I can't believe we have to wait until the shows come back from holiday break :[

Inhale...

hold it...hold it...hold it...exhale...........

Breathing is a wonderful thing, I should do it more often...deep breathing in particular. I've always found it incredibly relaxing.

Something I need to do more: Relaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax

This post will not be a rant. It will not be a bunch of rambles.

I received some great advice from a great friend, and I'm taking it to heart. I do need to focus on myself, as hard as that might be, I need to make the time. I get so caught up in a whirlwind of worries, I can't see the ground anymore, and it scares me. But I shouldn't be in whirlwinds, right? I embarked on this adventure to the lovely Seattle, Washington for many reasons. One of the most important being growing as a person. And I have grown, so I need to act like I've grown.

I'm in the need of re-inspiration to be me. Honestly, I haven't taken a picture for fun in so long. My bloggy is so sad without pictures, and more importantly, I LOVE taking pictures.

Tonight, I will embark on a new cooking adventure: vegan pumpkin cheesecake
I have been trying to make this cheesecake for weeks! I wanted to try to make it before we left for Thanksgiving so I could see if I wanted to make it for Thanksgiving...and I somehow never found the time to make it...then I decided I would just make it for Thanksgiving...but life got in the way, and I never got to make it...so tonight, I WILL make it! It will taste delicious. I will enjoy stuffing my face with it. It will make me happy.

p.s. our date last night was quite lovely. Dinner at one of our favorite places, followed by geeking out at a Barnes & Noble and getting to pick out 3 books (it was a buy 2 get the 3rd free special). Food+Books? My boy sure knows how to cheer me up :) 

Funky Town

but not the fun version.

I don't really know what it is, maybe it's the aforementioned stressed/distraught, but I've been in a bad funk recently. I've given a lot of thought about changing certain aspects of my life that I never thought I'd consider. But that's life, right? I won't mention what I've been thinking about to save readers from worrying, especially considering I've just been THINKING I have not actually acted upon my thoughts.

I just feel "off", but that's probably because Kyle and I have been a little "off" the past few days. To the point where both of us have stepped on each other's emotional toes just a few too many times, resulting in a nearly sleepless night. I guess I just never thought we'd do that to each other. But to be honest, this past year has presented a lot of stresses on our relationship. In eleven days we will hit the 2 and 1/2 year mark. It's a long time to be together, and sometimes it's easy to focus less on our relationship, and more on other things. To be honest, I think we just need a real date. Before the stresses of life came in, before we moved to Seattle...we went on dates all the time. No, I don't mean we went out every night, I just mean we spent dedicated amounts of time to one-on-one time where we can just live in our little love bubble. Recently those dates have turned into the occasional narwhal game, which is fine and dandy, but the occasional alone time isn't enough for me most days.

Not to mention, we will soon be rooming with two more friends...and the 4-2 outnumbering of boys to girls will be interesting...and by interesting, I mean I don't know how it'll go, haha. I'm worried that the Testosterone levels will be too high all the time...which means Jenny and I are going to have to find a way to not feel neglected/forgotten/overly picked on. Because our boyfriends our assholes. Not to us of course, but to each other, and to their friends. Soon we will be living with 4 assholes, and let me tell you...that's a lot to deal with. But it's not as if I don't like our new roomies individually, or even spending time with them together...it's a matter of living together, ya know what I mean? Kyle + Diego is sometimes even too much asshole to deal with! lol Sigh...oh well, I'm sure it'll be fine. It'll definitely take a few weeks of "transition" where we begin to adjust to expanding our apartment to fitting so many people, lol. On the bright side, our rent payments will go down...and next summer if we all still want to live together + Yanira and Lee, we can rent out a really big house, and I think that'd be fun :) Though at that point, I'm sure Jenny, Yanira and I will need to have an Estrogen only room ;) aka a library/craft room preferably near the kitchen. I would also love a house with a big backyard for a certain pupper, with space for a little garden for us to grow our veggies :)

Rambles aside, Kyle is planning to surprise me with a pick-me-up tonight when he picks-me-up from work, and I'm really looking forward to it :)

Heavy

My heart is feeling so heavy these past few weeks. Unfortunately, not in the "full of love and everything is too wonderful" kind of heavy...more like the "so many awful things are going on and it's difficult for me to cope" kind of heavy.

It's crazy, because I left for San Diego in hopes that I could be relieved of the stress I had been feeling, but I've come home only feeling more stressed and effing exhausted. The week started out just fine, I got to see a lot of friends...but everything changed Wednesday. My Dad started feeling awful chest pain, so Kyle and I accompanied my mom and him to the hospital since poor Omied had been sick in bed (with what we thought was food poisoning). Kyle and I were in the ER waiting room until 6am, not knowing what was going on. But we were both pretty sure it would be bad news, it wouldn't have taken them 5 hrs if everything was fine. It turns out that my dad had a mild heart attack, and on two other occasions, was on the verge of a major heart attack and had pretty much all the doctors in the ER trying to prevent that from happening as my Dad's body couldn't handle a major heart attack. In addition to the heart attack, my Dad was also diagnosed with a Pneumonia and Diabetes.

Boy do I hate hospitals...after an incredibly stressful night in the ER my dad was finally moved upstairs. The reason for his heart attack could have been easily prevented...sort of. My Dad is on dialysis because his kidney is failing, so last week when he went into the dialysis clinic, they spent a lot of time prodding around his arm for the vein, and as a result, his arm became pretty swollen. But that didn't stop them from doing the dialysis on his incredibly swollen arm (it was honestly 3X it's normal size). So after getting into an intense argument with the dialysis clinic about how they don't care about him, and they only see him as a dollar sign...my Dad decided to take a break from dialysis until his arm healed. I think if he had only skipped one day, it would have been fine, but he skipped two sessions. Eventually his heart started to become suffocated by the excessive water surrounding his heart/lungs that his body couldn't process, as well as trying to fight off the toxins the kidney couldn't remove. Thus, the heart attack.

The worst part about all of this is seeing my Dad looking so weak and defeated. Neither of those words should ever describe my Dad. He is a loud-mouth pompous asshole who has no filter when it comes to speaking his mind. Seeing him hooked up to a bunch of machines supporting his life, and complicity agreeing with whatever the doctors and nurses are telling him...it's so saddening. Luckily, he somehow convinced the doctors to use his swollen arm again for the dialysis he needed...they were trying to do a minor surgery in his neck to place a catheter type instrument in his chest for the dialysis. While it was a minor surgery, it was probably better for him not to undergo anymore stressful situations, or anesthesia.

I guess it was naive of me to want just one more normal Thanksgiving. One filled with the sounds of my dad angrily/happily shouting at the football game on TV, and my mom singing while I helped her cook dinner. As the saying goes, when it rains, it pours. Omied's food poisoning turned out to be the norovirus...which means my entire family spent the weekend vomiting our guts out.

So here I am at work....sipping on ginger ale and munching on saltine crackers, wondering how life got so complicated. All I want to do is sleep, but here I am. Sigh...maybe my Christmas vacation will be better?

Picture Time

Pictures from Kyle's Mommy Jan and his Grand Mommy Penny's visit!

Hair Hair!

I was kind of unsure of my haircut at first, but I am now brave enough to post pictures up here...so, enjoy! :)

Dear Life,

you are great. In a filled with surprises and make-me-smile kind of way :)

This week has been pretty wonderful...it started with a video chat from my too-far-away family who I love and adore...Linda was visiting my parents, so she too was in the super awesome video chat. I miss my family so much sometimes, they're some of the greatest people I know, and I miss being at "home" in my old room, waking up to the smell of my mother making breakfast, and the sounds of Sahar watching cartoons (or my Dad watching the news). I miss cuddling with Bambina on cold nights/days (the only time she ever wanted to cuddle, hah).

I'm really looking forward to visiting for Thanksgiving! I get to pretend I still live at "home", except it's all the better because Kyle gets to pretend too. I love how much my family loves Kyle, and how much he loves them...when we're all together, I just feel whole, ya know?

Video-chatting aside, I received such a generous gift as a random act of kindness from our neighbor, Hamlet. He's a really nice man, who's Armenian-Iranian (what a combo, right?) and has this gorgeous/funny big fat cat named Mooshi, and they recently got a pupper (well, he's an older dog, but still cute as a button) and the other day, we both were walking our goggies when we ran into eachother in the hallway...well, he asked me if Dexter was a picky eater, and I laughed and said absolutely not, because seriously, he eats anything he can put into his mouth, lol...so Hamlet got excited, asked me to hold onto his dog for just a minute, came back with a huge bag of dog treats and dog food that his dog doesn't like...honestly, like easily $100 worth of noms! And he just gave them to us! What a sweetheart :) I'm definitely baking them cookies for the holidays! :) :)

In other news, Kyle's Mommy & Grandmommy are flying in tomorrow for a visit! I'm pretty sure it worked out for them because of Veteran's day this weekend...which is good news for us! They haven't been up here yet, so I've made a list of places we can go see and restaurants to eat! :)

I'm really looking forward to just getting through today, going home and cleaning/grocery shopping...is that dorky? hah...oh wells...also, I chopped my hair off again! Well, I didn't do it this time, I actually had a professional have a go at my hair, and she was awesome! Jenny and I went to the Gene Juarez Academy for super awesome/cheap haircuts (seriously, $13 cuts with 20% off for being students) and it's the best and the cheapest cut I've ever gotten. And it was the best experience too, I super clicked with my stylist...and I'm kind of bummed that I was her last haircut (she's graduating Sunday, and is stopping by my store in search of graduation shoes, hah) But honestly, I'm hoping to stay in touch, because I don't really want anyone else to cut my hair, ever again, lol.

TTFN
(Ta-ta-for-now! hehehe)

Halloween Continued

Okies, here are the pictures I promised!